feeling sorry

feeling sorry(10/29/04)
bewildered clasp my palms to pray
close my eyes into cocoon of worry
pacing the empty room for a while
trying to muster my nerves to show smile

what now my love, i would be waiting
whatever the good days may bring
i walk outside and feel the gush of the wind
so chilly, so quiet i could hear a drop of a pin

yet i continue walking a distance,
wonderingwould i be alone again
counting days passing
must i be a beating heart in total darkness
blending with the echoes and tempting wishes
time… trees cast no more shadow
critters no longer hide but frolic on snow
reach down to pick a handful, toss to the bush
rattled a nestling bird; flew off course
i stop and watch what have i done
feeling sorry but she is gone